I finally finished the interrogatories for the child support hearing on the 31st.
It made me very angry that they pried into my life so much.
I knew I had to state what my income sources were, I don't have a problem with that, but I was very upset that they asked for me to describe in exact detail, the nature of my disability.
What does my disability have to do with my ex-husband's ability to pay child support?
I really want to know.
Is he going to try and use my disability to try and take custody of these kids he's never paid any attention to?
Is he going to say I'm too disabled to properly care for them?
I will be furious if his lawyer even goes there.
All of these years, I've been their only provider, the only person to care for them, and even though there were many rough days before and after my spine fusion, I still took incredible care of them.
They have never gone without anything they've ever needed, and I've worked my ass off to give them things they want.
On Tuesday the 15th, I go to see my surgeon and find out if I have to have neck fusion.
I'm scared about that, and my health is my focus right now, I can't let this hearing get to me.
I told the DA from Maine, the one who is supposed to be defending my case and trying to get me a proper amount of child support, what my health situation is at the moment and that was part of the reason it was taking me so long to get this paperwork done.
The other reason it was taking me so long, was because of how infuriating and intrusive the questions are.
Really personal, excessively personal, and over the top intrusive considering he was court ordered to pay child support.
In all these years, it's never been increased, there's never been a cost of living increase done automatically like so many other custodial parents tell me they've gotten.
It's so hard to even deal with this because other custodial parents get hundreds of dollars per month for their kids, they get a cost of living increase with their child support every year, and that's not ever happened with me.
I don't understand that.
Is Maine state so ass backwards, they don't do child support the same as other states?
This whole thing is just so frustrating and it's working my very last nerves which I know isn't good for my health, but why does this have to be so hard?
How the hell is my ex affording this lawyer yet he wants to decrease his child support?
I have so many questions, and I'm sure I'll never get the answer to those questions.
I'm just so very tired of it all.
I'm not giving up on this though, they can ask me all the questions they want, it doesn't change the fact that he needs to pay child support and get caught up on all of the years he didn't pay a dime.
I'm tired of him using the excuse that he has 6 kids as his reason for not paying for our two kids together.
It's not my fault or my son's fault, that he fathered so many kids.
And if this hearing goes down wrong, I'll find a way to hire my own attorney and I'll appeal the ruling and take it as far as I need to.
I'll take it to the press if I have to.
It made me very angry that they pried into my life so much.
I knew I had to state what my income sources were, I don't have a problem with that, but I was very upset that they asked for me to describe in exact detail, the nature of my disability.
What does my disability have to do with my ex-husband's ability to pay child support?
I really want to know.
Is he going to try and use my disability to try and take custody of these kids he's never paid any attention to?
Is he going to say I'm too disabled to properly care for them?
I will be furious if his lawyer even goes there.
All of these years, I've been their only provider, the only person to care for them, and even though there were many rough days before and after my spine fusion, I still took incredible care of them.
They have never gone without anything they've ever needed, and I've worked my ass off to give them things they want.
On Tuesday the 15th, I go to see my surgeon and find out if I have to have neck fusion.
I'm scared about that, and my health is my focus right now, I can't let this hearing get to me.
I told the DA from Maine, the one who is supposed to be defending my case and trying to get me a proper amount of child support, what my health situation is at the moment and that was part of the reason it was taking me so long to get this paperwork done.
The other reason it was taking me so long, was because of how infuriating and intrusive the questions are.
Really personal, excessively personal, and over the top intrusive considering he was court ordered to pay child support.
In all these years, it's never been increased, there's never been a cost of living increase done automatically like so many other custodial parents tell me they've gotten.
It's so hard to even deal with this because other custodial parents get hundreds of dollars per month for their kids, they get a cost of living increase with their child support every year, and that's not ever happened with me.
I don't understand that.
Is Maine state so ass backwards, they don't do child support the same as other states?
This whole thing is just so frustrating and it's working my very last nerves which I know isn't good for my health, but why does this have to be so hard?
How the hell is my ex affording this lawyer yet he wants to decrease his child support?
I have so many questions, and I'm sure I'll never get the answer to those questions.
I'm just so very tired of it all.
I'm not giving up on this though, they can ask me all the questions they want, it doesn't change the fact that he needs to pay child support and get caught up on all of the years he didn't pay a dime.
I'm tired of him using the excuse that he has 6 kids as his reason for not paying for our two kids together.
It's not my fault or my son's fault, that he fathered so many kids.
And if this hearing goes down wrong, I'll find a way to hire my own attorney and I'll appeal the ruling and take it as far as I need to.
I'll take it to the press if I have to.
I am not sure why the DA hasn't stepped in but they must have a reason. They may see it as a way to just pick his case apart. I do not think it's his (the ex ) way of trying to take custody from you. Men like that aren't wanting to disrupt their lives for the sake of actually taking care of their children. It's just his way of annoying you. Just stand your ground and become the bull in the china cabinet. Really. Since the court is being held in Maine, I would suggest on reading up on Maine's statutes concerning the child support laws. It would give you a heads up on what to expect in the hearing and if you educate yourself on what is allowable you can better defend yourself. I say that because sometimes you have to do what's in your best interest. I read up on Ohio's before I went to court. The Judge was impressed and pretty much ruled in my favor. I did compromise on the monetary isssue but I did get Jeff's dad to be responsible for 50% of Jeff's medical and for 50% of Jeff's future college expenses.Which usually does not happen in most cases because once a child turns 18 the financial support stops. I would gladly help you decipher all the legal mumbo jumbo. Just let me know.
Stay strong Kat, keep fighting!
I have no clue about the legal system in your country, but that sounds like very good advice from Mindy - to read up on the child support laws to equip yourself even further - and what a wonderful offer of help too =)