I just got back from my post-op appointment with my surgeon, I'm tired,
in serious need of a nap, but wanted to let everyone know how it all
went.
I had a series of xrays to see how the new fusion is holding, and it's looking good.
None of the titanium has moved, it's all in place where it's supposed to be, and he says it's doing good.
There will be a revision surgery, probably in about 6 months.
My head is still 20degrees off from being at the right place, meaning, my line of sight is 20degrees down instead of looking straight ahead.
So I'll be having another surgery, where he'll remove a vertebrae, and then install some more hardware which will place my head dead center, and no more movement will ever be possible again.
I have very limited movement right now, no left or right, some down, no up.
After the revision surgery, I will have no movement at all.
That's totally ok with me.
This neck surgery saved my life.
My vertebrae were pinching off my spinal cord, compressing it, I would have died.
Not being able to ever move my head in any direction ever again, is ok with me.
I've accepted all of this, I'm ok with it, so another surgery to set my head placement correctly so that I can look at people's faces and not their chests, is so totally ok with me.
We need to wait the 6 months so that this fusion can heal up a bit, too much trauma all at once is a very bad thing, so we'll wait and do the correction when I've healed up enough.
He's given me permission to sit a little bit longer, I can sit 1 hour, lay down 1 hour, for the next week, and then after that, he told me to do what feels best for me, to not over do anything.
If I feel tired, go lay down and rest, if I have energy, go ahead and sit for awhile.
This is good news for me.
I can now take on some more work, not as much as I was doing before surgery, but I can take on a bit more and that's awesome.
So now it's time to gross you out with some pictures of the stitches coming out.
As I posted this morning, the boys both stayed home sick from school, and Sebastian went with me.
He played the role of the documentary photographer, and got some pretty decent shots of my stitches coming out.
Ready?
These are all clickable for bigger if that's your thing.
Here's the beginning of my stitches coming out.
You can see part of my scar from my spine fusion that I had in February 2006.
It kind of looks like a zipper.
That screwed up haircut, is NOT what my sister did, that's the shaving and the cutting that the surgeons did before doing this fusion surgery.
Lovely isn't it?
Super short on one side, long on the other.
They need to keep their day jobs as surgeons.
Hair stylists they are not.
And yes, the stitches do go up into my hairline.
There are 3 more stitches up in my hair that you cannot see.
The stitches in my neck and hair line, hurt like crazy coming out.
I don't know why, but they stung a bit, and 4 times he had to stop while I caught my breath from having them tug at my skin so much.
All in all, I'm doing ok.
I have some pain which is normal, I have some depression which is also normal.
Both of those things will go away in time, losing mobility isn't an easy thing at all, especially a single mom who's used to doing everything by themselves, for themselves.
Losing the ability to move, to look at things, to have some major down time, is not at all easy to accept, but you start getting used to it, you start accepting it, slowly.
And that's where I'm at.
I'm accepting all of this slowly, I'm dealing with it as best I can.
I know that this surgery saved my life, but at the same time I'm very sad for what I've lost.
But even though the road ahead is still going to be a bumpy one, I have another surgery to face in my future, I'm ok.
I can work for now, I can start being a little more productive, start doing more at home without over doing it, and start getting some of my life back.
I know that in 6 months or so, I'll be right back here recovering from another surgery, but that's ok, it really is.
I'm alive, I'm still here to watch my sons grow up, to laugh and play with them, to be here, and that's what is the most important.
====================
I had a series of xrays to see how the new fusion is holding, and it's looking good.
None of the titanium has moved, it's all in place where it's supposed to be, and he says it's doing good.
There will be a revision surgery, probably in about 6 months.
My head is still 20degrees off from being at the right place, meaning, my line of sight is 20degrees down instead of looking straight ahead.
So I'll be having another surgery, where he'll remove a vertebrae, and then install some more hardware which will place my head dead center, and no more movement will ever be possible again.
I have very limited movement right now, no left or right, some down, no up.
After the revision surgery, I will have no movement at all.
That's totally ok with me.
This neck surgery saved my life.
My vertebrae were pinching off my spinal cord, compressing it, I would have died.
Not being able to ever move my head in any direction ever again, is ok with me.
I've accepted all of this, I'm ok with it, so another surgery to set my head placement correctly so that I can look at people's faces and not their chests, is so totally ok with me.
We need to wait the 6 months so that this fusion can heal up a bit, too much trauma all at once is a very bad thing, so we'll wait and do the correction when I've healed up enough.
He's given me permission to sit a little bit longer, I can sit 1 hour, lay down 1 hour, for the next week, and then after that, he told me to do what feels best for me, to not over do anything.
If I feel tired, go lay down and rest, if I have energy, go ahead and sit for awhile.
This is good news for me.
I can now take on some more work, not as much as I was doing before surgery, but I can take on a bit more and that's awesome.
So now it's time to gross you out with some pictures of the stitches coming out.
As I posted this morning, the boys both stayed home sick from school, and Sebastian went with me.
He played the role of the documentary photographer, and got some pretty decent shots of my stitches coming out.
Ready?
These are all clickable for bigger if that's your thing.
Here's the beginning of my stitches coming out.
You can see part of my scar from my spine fusion that I had in February 2006.
It kind of looks like a zipper.
That screwed up haircut, is NOT what my sister did, that's the shaving and the cutting that the surgeons did before doing this fusion surgery.
Lovely isn't it?
Super short on one side, long on the other.
They need to keep their day jobs as surgeons.
Hair stylists they are not.
And yes, the stitches do go up into my hairline.
There are 3 more stitches up in my hair that you cannot see.
The stitches in my neck and hair line, hurt like crazy coming out.
I don't know why, but they stung a bit, and 4 times he had to stop while I caught my breath from having them tug at my skin so much.
All in all, I'm doing ok.
I have some pain which is normal, I have some depression which is also normal.
Both of those things will go away in time, losing mobility isn't an easy thing at all, especially a single mom who's used to doing everything by themselves, for themselves.
Losing the ability to move, to look at things, to have some major down time, is not at all easy to accept, but you start getting used to it, you start accepting it, slowly.
And that's where I'm at.
I'm accepting all of this slowly, I'm dealing with it as best I can.
I know that this surgery saved my life, but at the same time I'm very sad for what I've lost.
But even though the road ahead is still going to be a bumpy one, I have another surgery to face in my future, I'm ok.
I can work for now, I can start being a little more productive, start doing more at home without over doing it, and start getting some of my life back.
I know that in 6 months or so, I'll be right back here recovering from another surgery, but that's ok, it really is.
I'm alive, I'm still here to watch my sons grow up, to laugh and play with them, to be here, and that's what is the most important.
