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I was asked what my ideal cruise vacation would be, and honestly, I don't ever think I'll go on a cruise for a couple of reasons.
One reason being money.
Cruises are usually pretty expensive unless you get like a major discount or if they are running a special cruise adventure, and if you take the super cheap rooms which I hear are very small.
Not liking small spaces, I don't think I could do a small room, so yeah, I would need a wicked lot of money so that I could afford one of the big rooms like a suite, not an interior room.
Those are way too small.
The second reason being that I am absolutely terrified of drowning.
I am a terrible swimmer, and I've also watched one too many movies about cruise ships sinking.
Movies like Titanic and Poseidon.
Yeah, scary stuff so I have this major fear of taking cruises.
And I know, that's totally crazy thinking, you never ever hear about cruise ships sinking, it's the stuff in movies, not reality, so I don't know why I have this fear, but I do.

But if I had the money and if I could make sure that the particular ship I'd be on had never had any accidents, fires, or other mishaps out on the big blue and very deep sea, I would probably be ok going on one of those Caribbean cruises.


















I've heard some nice things about Half Moon cay, so maybe I'd go there, or stop there as one of the ports of call that they go to.
It looks really nice, quiet, peaceful, and goodness knows that I could really use some nice and quiet, and peaceful relaxing time away from everything that's going on in my life right now.
So yeah, maybe there.
I dunno, maybe someday I'll work up the money and the courage to go on a cruise.
We were planning one about 9 years ago, we were all going to try and go to Atlantis, but our plans fell through after an old roommate stole all of the change out of my 10 gallon water jug that I was saving all of my change in for our trip.
There was almost $1,000 in that jug, and he took it all.
He went in my room while I was at work, and took all of the money out and left me a note, an IOU for the money.
He counted it up, or used one of those change machines, so the IOU said that he owed me $987.56.
He never did pay me back.

I hear from friends all of the time how much fun cruises are, and they tell me that I'd love it once I got on the ship and we were going, once I started doing all of the fun things they have on board, and I bet that would, I love doing all that fun stuff.
So yeah, maybe someday when I have the money I'll go and take a cruise.
I am pretty sure that I would really love it.
I know I would, I just have to do it some one of these days. 

I took my 9th dose of Elavil tonight, and I think that it IS starting to work.
I am starting to not get as emotional as I have been over the last few months, and I know this because while Mark was playing his game, WoW, the person who is part of the problems I am currently having with my family, popped up in the private chat system and started talking to him about it again.
Mark knows that she is lying about what is going on, so he decided to test her, to see if she would lie again.
Mark had read the email from my parents that said if we go to Maine, that we are not welcome to stay with them at their house while we are there, that we can only visit for 1 day, it was my mother's words, her email sent to me, and he knows exactly what that email said,
so he wanted to see if she would lie about me/it again, and she did.

Mark asked her why Ninny and Pop-pop do not want us to stay with them, and she replied back that they never said that, that I am twisting my mother's words around.
Mark replied to her that he read my mother's email, that I did not twist anything around, that is what it said, and that they also said it to Sebastian when he called to ask why we couldn't stay with them.
She then told Mark that Sebastian is lying, that my parents never said that, but he hung up on them before they could finish what they were trying to tell him.
Mark then told her that wasn't true either, that he was listening to Sebastian on the phone, he heard his grandfather say that we could not stay when we visit, and that Sebastian did not hang up on them. Pop-pop said that he needed to go take a shower and then get ready for bed, Sebastian said ok, I love you, and Pop-pop said it back to him, that he loved him, and good-bye, Sebastian said good-bye, and they both hung up together.
She did not reply, so Mark asked if she got the message, she said yes, but still insisted that I twisted my parents words around and that Sebastian did hang up on them, and then she logged out of the game.

Mark called me into the room to tell me what just happened, and he was really angry that she lied again, and he wanted me to read their exchange.
I couldn't read the words on the screen, the font is too small and it's in pink, so he read it to me, his words to her, her words back, I followed along the screen the best that I could, and then he said he couldn't believe she just lied again, he was really hurt and really angry that she is lying, like super pissed off that she lied again.
Then he said that he was really sorry for doubting me about the lies that have been going on, that he wasn't sure who to believe, but now he saw it with his own eyes, she is lying, she lied to him when he knows the truth about what my parents said in the email, that I did not twist their words around, and that Sebastian did not hang up on them, he knows the truth and he is really sorry that he ever doubted me.

A week ago this would have torn me up pretty bad, I would have begun bawling my eyes out, I would have started yelling and screaming about it all, but I didn't this time.
Instead, I asked him to stand up, I gave him a huge hug and told him that I am so sorry that all of this is happening and that if I knew a way to make it all end, that I would stop it immediately, but I don't know how to make it stop, I have no idea how to make everyone else see that lies are being told.
He hugged me back and told me that it was ok, he wiped away the few tears that were falling down my face, and he told me that someday everyone will learn the truth about all of this, that they will see that I am not the one lying, that I am not doing illegal drugs, that I and not the cause of all of this.
Then he said that he was really sorry for ever calling her, that all he wanted was just a few days away from me, a break from it all because I was a mess, I was crying all of the time for days, that he and Sebastian just wanted a break because they didn't know how to help me feel better, they were scared, and tired, and worried, that is all, they never wanted what is happening, that if they knew that wanting a break was going to cause all of this, make my parents not want to see me or speak to me ever again, that they never would have asked for any help, that they would have just hung in there until my doctor's appointment a week away. 

I could see that he was really upset and really sorry, he was all teary eyed and hugging me so tightly I thought he was going to break my ribs.
Last week this would have really ripped me up, I would have been screaming about how this is all just so wrong, I would have been crying like crazy, but tonight I just hugged him back and told him it was ok, that it was all going to be ok eventually, and that I do NOT blame him and Sebastian for any of this, it's not their fault at all, and that I loved him very, very much.
He stopped hugging me, wiped away his tears and then mine, and told me that he loved me very much too.

I am just so sorry that all of this is happening, I really do wish that I knew a way to make it all stop, but I don't.
I just have to wait it out, hope that someday everyone will realize that these are all really vicious lies, and that none of it is true at all.
I want my sons to stop hurting, I want them to be ok, to be loved and welcomed by their family, but until the lies get cleared up, that we are just going to have to forget it all, just do what we need to do as a family, keep our little family together and going.
It's all that we can do, it's all that I can do, I need to be here for my sons, and so yeah, I do think that the antidepressant is really starting to work, I am not as emotional as I was, I have a better grip on the situation, and so that is a good thing.
I'm still not "happy", I am still carrying a lot of anger and guilt, but with the counseling and the antidepressant, I think that those things will get better in time.

Verizon was here all afternoon installing the Fios, and so a lot of my things had to be moved around to install the new router and stuff.
I tried to break in and move my stuff before the guy did, but he just swooped in and did it, not giving me the chance to do any of it.
This caused my OCD to go crazy, I can't handle people touching my stuff, moving things out of place, and my whole living room was basically turned upside down while the guy worked.
In the process of him moving things around, some stuff got knocked down but it wasn't noticed until after he left and I was putting my desk back in order.
I found one of my micro sd cards on the floor, along with one of my favorite pens.
This was really difficult for me, I can't explain it, if you don't have any thing like this, it's hard to understand.
The boys knew I was having a rough time with someone, a stranger, touching all of the things on my desk, I was pacing around the other rooms of the house, I couldn't watch, and if I did, I started to panic and stuff.
I know this sounds all crazy, and it is all crazy, but I really don't do well with people touching my things, strangers or family, they are my things, and I do not like other people touching them.

I don't have cable, I really hate our local cable company, Comcast, and due to some sort of purchasing rights agreement between the city and them, we are stuck with them instead of being allowed the choice between them and Brighthouse, which is far cheaper and has far superior customer service as well, but whatever, we have lived without cable for like 9 years now, not really a big deal.

Most of the shows that are on cable, produced by the premium channels like HBO, Showtime etc, are available on Netflix once the season ends, so if my friends and everyone else says that some show is truly amazing, I wait for the season to be over, and then add it (the whole season) to my Netflix queue.
Such is the case with HBO's True Blood.
They have just started season 2, so that's the website you'll see if you click that link.
True Blood is based on The Southern Vampire Mysteries, aka Sookie Stackhouse, Books 1-7   book series by Charlaine Harris.
The series details the lives of vampires and humans coexisting in the fictional town of Bon Temps Louisiana.
The series centers on the main character Sookie Stackhouse, a telepathic waitress, who falls in love with vampire Bill Compton.

Almost all of my friends have ranted and raved about this show, it was True Blood this, and True Blood that, and OMG Kat! You LOVE vampire stories, well this is the most kickass vampire show ever, they fall in love, it's modern, you'll love it!
And all I could really think was yuh, right, that's what everyone told me about Twilight too, and OMG, I wanted to stab my eyeballs out with a spork after that absolutely horrible and so freaking stupid vampire crapfest.
Seriously, Twilight is the lamest vampire series I have ever read in my entire life, it's just so damn emo and pathetic, and W.T.F. vampires don't go out during the day because they glisten?
And then I watched the movie, (I did read the books, a friend sent them to me to read) and I saw the glisten scene and was all OMG, no, Stephenie Meyer was smoking some crack rock or something when she decided to write that the REAL reason that vampires don't go out in the sun is because they glisten.
She completely ignored hundreds of years of folklore on the subject, and made the vampires in her books these pathetic, glistening, emo vampires who I would have shoved a stake through all of their glistening skin and emo hearts just to make them stop all of the damn whining.
And please, don't even get me started on the piss poor actors they chose for the lead roles of Bella and Edward.
The guy is NOT good looking folks, just because he played a vampire does not make him hot, he's just not ok looking at all, there's something very weird about the placement of his facial features, and Kristen Stewart, wow, the girl is just a very bad actress, but she plays the role of emo pathetic follower girl wonderfully. Bella is the type of girl who can't be alone, she has to have a man in her life to be complete, and in book 2 when Edward leaves her so his family doesn't eat her, she gets pretty damn cozy with Jacob all the while still pining away for Edward.
If ya can't be with the one you love, honey, love the one with your with.
Bella is co-dependant and gives independent girls everywhere a really bad name.
If I had a tween-teen daughter, I wouldn't let her near those books or movie because of the poor role model that Bella is for girls everywhere.

Wow, went off on a sucky vampire tangent, sorry about that.
Anyway, back to True Blood.
Like I said, all of my friends have been raving about it for a very long time, and after a thread on the local forums where even a bunch of guys that I know who normally are not into this kind of stuff, were posting how much they loved it, I decided to add season 1 to my queue.
I only have the 2 movies at a time but unlimited monthly rentals plan, so only discs 1 and 2 showed up yesterday, each disc had 2 episodes on them, I already watched all 4 episodes, and will be mailing them back immediately so that I can get the next 2 discs in the series, and there are 5 discs in total.
And then I'll have to wait for season 2 to finish before I can see what happens.
*sigh*
But so far, after just 4 episodes, I am totally loving this show!
THIS is how vampires are meant to be, strong, powerful, dangerous, mysterious, they don't go out in the sun because it will burn them, they have the power to control their human victims, and the show is just extremely well written.
It's super funny in some parts, bloody in others, incredibly hot and sexy in others, and wow, just wow, my friends were right about this one.

As I was watching the show, I was noticing how well the scenery is, how authentic it all looked, so I was curious where they filmed it, I wanted to know if it was really filmed on location in Louisiana, or on some Hollywood back lot, or if they got a great price on some  Wilmington NC real estate due to how southern looking that area is, and I've heard that a lot of movies are being filmed there lately.
Well I found out that they film it in several locations actually.
They do film parts of it in Hollywood of course, some in Los Angeles and  Eagle Rock California, and they also do film on location in Shreveport Louisiana, which is mentioned quite a few times in the show.

Anyway, I am really liking True Blood, I plan on watching all the rest of season 1, and if I still feel this excited about it at the end of season 1, I'll wait for season 2 to hit Netflix and I'll keep up with the whole Sookie and Bill, human and vampire love story plus murder mystery, drugs, sex, and other sordid story lines.

Vampires glisten in the sun, oh man, I still cannot get over that whole thing.
It's just so incredibly stupid. 

I knew that I would not be able to get Mark that HP notebook that Buy.com had on their weekly special, it's not on sale this week plus I didn't have the money, but I really don't need to worry.
They have a whole section of their site specifically devoted to laptop deals .
That's pretty freaking awesome.
They have every possible brand, every possible size, and every possible price range, and many of them on sale at some really incredibly low prices.
So I know that when I need to get him a laptop in the fall for college, I will be able to find him a really good one at a really good price from them. They make it so incredibly easy to find just the right one, he'll even be able to pick a color on certain brands and models if he wants to.

I started shopping at Buy.com years ago, like back in 2004 or 2005.
I started shopping with them because I was doing paid surveys for a company, and at the time, they only paid in Buy.com gift certificates, they now pay through paypal and Buy.com gift certificates, so that's cool they offer a choice now, but I still take the gift certificates.
I would cash out my gift certs from the site, they only gave us so many days to redeem them at Buy.com, and then I would just let them build up until I had a lot of them, and then I'd go shopping.
I've been loving shopping with them ever since.
I love their low prices, their fast shipping, and the fact that they have free shipping on almost every single item that they sell.
Not too many other online retailers offer free shipping on so many items, heck, most don't offer free shipping on hardly anything unless you spend like a minimum of $25.
At Buy.com, I bought a $6.99 DVD, and got free shipping, so yeah, I'll shop there over other retailers any day, especially when it comes time to get Mark his laptop because those suckers are wicked heavy and if I had to pay shipping, it would be like super freaking expensive.

We've only had the Sims 3 for a few days now, but because of everything that's going on, I'm really glad that I have it.
I have been having some super bad times here, up one minute, down the next, very depressing thoughts, crying off and on, so I'm doing things to distract myself like playing with my new Sims 3 game.
There is so much that you can do in it now.
There may not be a lot of choices for furniture or lamps and stuff, but with the customization tool, you can make every single item exactly how you want it.
Don't like the pattern and color the couch comes in?
Click the color palette and go choose a different pattern from a totally different item, and then choose a totally different color scheme for it, anything that you want.
And just like the previous versions of the game, there are some very creative people out there making clothes, Sims, furniture, and patterns for the game that you can download, already.
The game has only been out since June 2nd!

I've made my Sim, her faves are cheeseburgers, music, the color black, and her lifetime wish is to become a world famous chef. She's doing well so far, her cooking skill is at level 4 so far with no cheating codes either, and I've been slowly building and decorating her house according to her likes and dislikes.
You can tell when they like or dislike a room by the mood meter that is always present, and if they like it, you see a happy face, it tells you they get like 10 points for being in a nicely decorated room, but if they are in a room they hate, they lose points and it tells you to change the flooring or the wallpaper, or the chairs suck or whatever.
Right now, she's not happy with the patio furniture, so I'm testing out colors and patterns to find just the most perfect combination of patio furniture covers that will make her have a happy face every time she goes outside to get some sun and relax.

The game is an excellent distraction for me, it's helping me to calm down and relax, and it's a ton of fun to play with. 

Yup, that's what state representative Kevin Ambler, a Republican from Tampa, wants to do.

He has filed an amendment to a bill that aims to repeal a variety of tax exemptions.
The amendment would establish a tax on "digital downloads" including music, audio books, ring-tones and videos.
The average price increase would probably be around seven cents per 99 cent download.
Ambler also filed another amendment that has to do with air-craft taxes.
The measure is set for a chamber vote sometime Tuesday afternoon.

This amendment would tax us on all digital downloads in the state of Florida, and the reason it's being done?
Well Mr. Ambler had one of his staffers do some research, (he looks far too old to even know what an iPod is) and discovered that if they taxed every single digital download of music, audio books, ring tones and videos, that the state could get several billion dollars in revenue.
The news report on the corresponding tv channel, Fox 13, did not say how many years it would take to get that much revenue, but I will update this post if they say.

This guy is a total money grubbing asshat.
I would like to know exactly how they intend to pull off this tax.
It's only for Florida, it's not nationwide, so how are they going to implement this tax on sites that offer digital downloads?
Music, for example, are they going to send notice to iTunes and other music sites like Amazon, and tell them that they need to start taxing everyone with a Florida address in their profiles, and/or a Florida based IP address?

Even though this goes to a representative chamber vote this afternoon, I am sending all of my reps an email urging them to vote against this.
The state has already nailed us with an increase in the sin tax, and now they want to go after anything else that brings us even the slightest bit of enjoyment.
It's not right, especially in this economy.
We're all getting battered here by losing jobs and homes, the cost of living increasing, the price of gas and essentials like food and medicine keep going up, and they upped the sin tax on April 1st, and now this.
Why don't they just hand every citizen a rope so we can all hang ourselves because life is kicking us in the ass over and over and over, and we're stressed the fuck out and depressed.

I urge every single Florida resident to send emails to their state reps this morning, do it immediately, and tell them to not pass this amendment.

It's one of those lazy Sundays where we all just lay around on the furniture and do absolutely nothing but watch crappy tv shows and even crappier movies on tv.
I do need to go out a little later on and pick up some food from Publix, get more soda and cat food, some other stuff for them to eat during the long vacation week.
But for now, none of us have showered or dressed, we haven't done much of anything at all but watch movies on tv.
Currently, we're watching Great Expectations , the one with Ethan Hawke, not the older version.
Some of the scenes were filmed right here in Sarasota at the Ca d' Zan mansion of John and Mable Ringling.
My friend Shell and I got to tour it last year, it was amazing, so beautiful inside.
You'd never know that watching the movie, they really dirtied it up to make it look really old and disheveled.

I think I need to spend some time cleaning up my computer this weekend because it's seriously lagging.
I know it's not a problem with the computer memory because that's all new, well, in the last 7 months new, it shouldn't be the cause of the trouble.
Here's what it's doing.
I find a funny picture I want to save, or any picture I want to save really, and when I save it, it's seriously lagging.
Before, it would just save it in like 2 seconds, now it's taking up to 10 seconds to save it.

I admit that I haven't cleaned it in a few weeks, just kept forgetting to do it, so I think I need to spend some time defragging, cleaning up disc space, run spyware and greyware scans etc.

 It'll probably take close to an hour because it's been a few weeks, but once it's done it will work awesome and fast again.

So I don't really have to go and buy a new HDTV when I get my taxes back now that the antenna and converter box is all hooked up, but I still want one.
I am not going to buy one, I just want one.

I do enjoy how it all looks now when the stations are coming in, it's as clear as cable, so no more static, blue screen, noise and really bad picture, but there's still a bunch of channels that have not made the switch.
Channel 8 said that only 4 stations in all of Tampa Bay are making the switch right now, and the rest are waiting until June.
They're saying that it's because the viewers aren't ready, and that's part of the problem, but a big part of the problem is that a lot of the stations are not ready.

We've watch a couple of movies over the last week that were pretty good.
The Secret Life of Bees was pretty good, and we also really liked Repo! The Genetic Opera.
Hancock sucked in my opinion, and while I enjoyed it because of the gore, Saw V wasn't all that great.
I have a bunch of stuff on our queue, but it says waiting next to each, so I have no idea what will be coming next.

I went for my daily walk just a bit ago, all the way up to the corner store and back, I needed to get a loaf of bread anyway, and I was craving chocolate, so I grabbed a snickers too.
Yum.

When I got back, I checked the mail box, which amazingly, has not been hit by a car again in a good long while, (knock on wood) and in today's mail, I got our new Netflix movies, Hancock and Repo! The Genetic Opera.
The teens want to see Hancock, and I want to see Repo!
It looks sorta interesting and it's got good reviews on Netflix.
I also got my dvd that I ordered with my Buy.com gift certificate from a shopping mix-up, the Poltergeist (25th Anniversary Edition).
I have always loved that movie, it's been digitally remastered, and it's just a classic, plus, I had to spend the rest of the gc, it was only $6.00, so I said why not.

Then I saw it.
A jury duty summons.
I can't serve jury duty.
A) I can't get all the way to Venice every day, no car, no driver's license, and B) medically, I'm just in no shape to do it.
I take heavy duty pain meds 24/7, I have doctor's appointments up the wazoo all of the time, and I cannot sit in the same spot for hours on end every day.
I am constantly having to get up, walk around, lay down etc, so yeah, I cannot serve jury duty.
I'm all about doing my civic duty and all of that, but I can't do jury duty, not right now, it's physically impossible for me to get there and sit there all of the hours that would be needed.

I was asked to try out a new hair removal product, and because of all my spine issues, not being able to bend, I said sure, why not!
I have such a difficult time shaving my legs due to my spine fusion surgeries, so I'm always on the lookout for new, easy to use, and good working hair removal products.

When the package showed up last week and I opened it, I had to laugh, it was a product that my teens and I laugh uncontrollably over every time we see the commercial for it.

In the big padded envelope was the product Smooth Away Hair Removal  with 2 Applicators + 24 Pads + Hair Inhibitor Moisturizer to use after your remove the hair.

Why do the teens and I laugh every time we see the commercial?
Because it's high grade sandpaper.
The Smooth Away pads are "covered with superfine crystals that buff away unwanted hair leaving your skin so soft and incredibly smooth."

Years ago, like when I was about 17, maybe 18, there was another product exactly like this put out by Sally Hansen, and I bought it to try it out.
I hated shaving because I was always nicking myself, I hadn't mastered the technique yet, and I lived in Maine where if you took a shower longer than 5 minutes in the winter, you would run out of hot water, and as most women know, cold water closes your pores, which pretty much makes sure that trying to shave your legs would be difficult.
The pores would be closed, my legs would be covered in goosebumps from the icy cold water, and so yeah, I'd nick my legs to death.

But when my Dad saw my purchase of the Sally Hansen product, he giggled, and said to me, "If you had told me you were going to buy some sandpaper to get rid of your leg hairs, I could have saved you some money. I have a whole box of sandpaper in the basement in all grades, I'm sure I've got one just like this down there, could have saved you your money."
Then he started laughing again.

But I had agreed to try out the Smooth Away and do a review of it, and so, I have tried it out.
I got it last week, and wanted to try it out for a whole week to be able to do a proper review of both the Smooth Away and the hair growth inhibitor moisturizer that came with it.
The Smooth Away does work, it really does, but it takes a bit of time to do it, much longer than shaving or waxing, much much longer than using Veet, but it does indeed work.

You take the handled buffing pad, and then remove the sticky backing from one of the Smooth Away pads, and stick it to the buffing pad.
Place about 3-4 fingers inside the handle, and start rubbing in a circular motion on the areas that you want to remove the hair from.
You have to rub in small circles several times in 1 area to remove the hair, so it does take a bit of time.
If you want to use this, I would suggest doing it the night before you need to be hair free, and set aside about an hour to do it.
I would suggest taking a shower, do not apply any lotion to your legs or arms, (if you remove your arm hairs) and then dry your legs thoroughly before starting.
The places you want to remove the hair from must be completely dry or it won't work, and it definitely doesn't work if you have any lotion on your skin.

I also tried out the hair growth inhibitor moisturizer lotion after removing the hair, and it's very silky, it leaves your skin feeling very soft and smooth, it has a very pleasant smell, and is a terrific moisturizer.
As for helping to stop new hair growth, it does an ok job as far as I can tell.
You have to apply it every day for several days after removing the hair with the Smooth Away pads, in order for it to get into the hair follicles and work, so after every shower, I applied the hair growth inhibitor moisturizer instead of my usual moisturizer, and I would say it doesn't stop new hair from growing, but it does slow it down.
I would wait about 5-10 minutes after removing the hair before applying the hair growth inhibitor moisturizer or any other lotion, so the skin has a chance to "calm down", or you may end up with a slight redness like I did the first time I tried it out.
My skin was slightly irritated, and so adding the moisturizer right away left it looking a little red.

As for exfoliating your skin, I suppose it works, it is a high grade sandpaper, so it does remove some dead skin from the top layer leaving you feeling a bit smoother after.
As for how long it lasts before you have to do it again, about the same amount of time as shaving, maybe a little less, because it's not lifting and cutting the hairs off, it's simply sloughing them away from the surface only.
You do get stubble when it regrows, but if you use the hair growth inhibitor lotion, they take more time to grow back and slightly less course hairs grow back, but there will still be stubble.

The kit I received comes with 2 handled buffing pad applicators, 1 for large areas like legs, arms, men's backs or chests, and 1 small handled buffing pad applicator 1 for the bikini line or upper lip and chin areas, 24 crystallized buffing pads, 12 large and 12 small,  and 1-4 ounce tube of of the hair growth inhibitor moisturizer, and 1 case to hold the pads and handled pad applicators, and it retails for about $29.99
They also offer smaller kits, with just the 1 large buffing pad and 1 small buffing pad, and only 10 crystallized hair removal pads. 
 




















This product does work, but it's not a good fit for me.
I cannot bend all the way down to reach my lower leg areas with a long handled razor, so trying to bend and reach down with my hand inside of a buffing pad, was impossible for me to do.
I managed to get to just above my calves with it, and then had to use my regular razor to remove the hairs below it. 

I am one of those people that loves to look at all of the things that I wish I had the money to buy, adds them to my wishlist, and then when I have the money, I make the decision among the 3-4 things I placed on my list.
But every time an online retailer says they are having a sale or they are Buy.com and always have weekly deals, I am so there checking them out.

Now that the digital converter box is is attached to the outside of the house, and all installed correctly inside, my tv is working and looking beautiful, I no longer really need to look at a new digital tv, so now I get to do some wishful shopping at other things I would like to have someday.

So now I'm looking at a laptop, this laptop to be exact, an Acer Aspire One A150.
I even like the color it comes in, the one pictured on the site, I don't know if it comes in other colors, but I like this sapphire blue one very much.
You can click the image to see it bigger, and also click the link to see other views of it.
















If I had a laptop, then on days when I'm not feeling well, having trouble moving around, sitting and stuff, I could lay in my bed and take advantage of our wireless router.

I could lay in my bed, be all toasty and warm under my comforter, have my kitties at my side, and get some work done.
My blogs have been totally neglected the last few days, and generally get neglected whenever the weather kicks me down, so having a laptop, I could work in bed.
I could post to my blogs, I could read everyone else blogs, I could stay on top of everything instead of laying in bed or on the couch feeling miserable and guilty because I'm letting people down.
I don't know if other people see me being absent as letting them down, it's just how I feel.
I have tremendous guilt when I'm not able to get my work done due to my health, or help people with things they need help with.

Anyway, I really like this laptop, and I love Acer computers anyway.
I now own 2 Acers, mine and the one I bought my sons, they are great computers, never have any issues with them, they are wicked easy to upgrade and just a wicked nice product at great prices.
Buy.com's normal price is $389.00, and right now they have it at $50.00 off, making it just $329.00.
That's a really great price, plus, as always, free shipping!
I love how they always have free shipping on almost every single item they sell, that's a huge bonus, especially in today's economy.
Paying shipping on large and/or expensive items, can be a deciding factor in whether or not people actually buy the product, so yeah, free shipping is a major bonus.

Here's just a few of it's features which make me want this Acer Aspire One A150 laptop even more;
It has a 160GB HDD, 8.9" WSVGA, 802.11b/g, Webcam, Multi-in-one card reader, and it has Microsoft XP Home which I absolutely love.
All of our computers have been Windows XP home, and it's by far the easiest version of Windows to work with.
Another feature that is awesome for me because I'm still on weight-lifting restrictions and will be for a very long time to come, (another surgery coming up soon) it only weighs 2.2lbs.
I'm still only allowed to lift things that weigh 5lbs or less, so yeah, a super lightweight laptop would be awesome for me!
All of the reviews of the Acer Aspire One A150 are really, really good too, everyone who has purchased it, according to the reviews, absolutely loves it, the only negative thing most reviews are saying is that it doesn't have a dvd drive, but all of them that said that, said they used a portable usb dvd drive, and that made it perfect to use in their opinions.

So now when I get my taxes back, I might just have to get this laptop.
Even though it probably won't be part of the weekly deals anymore, it's still an incredible buy at $389.00.
My sister just got a new Dell laptop with about the same exact features a few months ago, and it cost about 4 times as much as this one, and the features are almost duplicate except that hers does have a dvd drive.
So yeah, total no-brainer, I'm seriously thinking this will be part of my income tax refund shopping.
This and a new cell phone.

I found this one over at Tina's blog and just HAD to do this one!!

I love movies! Hahahaha!

SUPPOSEDLY if you've seen over 85 films, you have no life.

There are 239 films on this list. Put x's next to the films you've seen, add them up, change the header adding your number, and click post at the bottom. Have fun.

(x) Rocky Horror Picture Show
(x) Grease
(x) Pirates of the Caribbean
(x) Pirates of the Caribbean 2: Dead Man's Chest
(x) Boondock Saints
(x) Fight Club
(x) Starsky and Hutch
(x) Neverending Story
(x) Blazing Saddles
(x) Airplane
Total: 10

(x) The Princess Bride
(x) Anchorman
(x) Napoleon Dynamite
(x) Labyrinth
(x) Saw
(x) Saw II
(x) White Noise
() White Oleander
() Anger Management
(x) 50 First Dates
(x) The Princess Diaries
() The Princess Diaries 2: Royal Engagement
Total so far: 20

(x) Scream
(x) Scream 2
(x) Scream 3
(x) Scary Movie
() Scary Movie 2
() Scary Movie 3
() Scary Movie 4
(x) American Pie
(x) American Pie 2
() American Wedding
() American Pie Band Camp
Total so far: 26

(x) Harry Potter 1
(x) Harry Potter 2
(x) Harry Potter 3
(x) Harry Potter 4
(x) Resident Evil 1
(x) Resident Evil 2
(x) The Wedding Singer
() Little Black Book
(x) The Village
(x) Lilo & Stitch
Total so far: 35

(x) Finding Nemo
(x) Finding Neverland
(x) Signs
(x) The Grinch
(x) Texas Chainsaw Massacre
(x) Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning
(x) White Chicks
(x) Butterfly Effect
(x) 13 Going on 30 (Suddenly 30)
(x) I, Robot
(x) Robots
Total so far: 46

(x) Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story
(x) Universal Soldier
(x) Lemony Snicket: A Series Of Unfortunate Events
(x) Along Came Polly
(x) Deep Impact
() KingPin
(x) Never Been Kissed
(x) Meet The Parents
(x) Meet the Fockers
(x) Eight Crazy Nights
(x) Joe Dirt
(x) KING KONG (2003)
Total so far: 57

() A Cinderella Story
(x) The Terminal
() The Lizzie McGuire Movie
() Passport to Paris
(x) Dumb & Dumber
() Dumber & Dumberer
(x) Final Destination
(x) Final Destination 2
(x) Final Destination 3
(x) Halloween
(x) The Ring
(x) The Ring 2
() Surviving X-MAS
(x) Flubber
Total so far: 66

(x) Harold & Kumar Go To White Castle
(x) Practical Magic
(x) Chicago
(x) Ghost Ship
(x) From Hell
(x) Hellboy
(x) Secret Window
(x) I Am Sam
(x) The Whole Nine Yards
(x) The Whole Ten Yards
Total so far: 76

(x) The Day After Tomorrow
(x) Child's Play
(x) Seed of Chucky
(x) Bride of Chucky
(x) Ten Things I Hate About You
() Just Married
(x) Gothika
(x) Nightmare on Elm Street
(x) Sixteen Candles
(x) Remember the Titans
() Coach Carter
(x) The Grudge
(x) The Grudge 2
(x) The Mask
() Son Of The Mask
Total so far: 89

(x) Bad Boys
() Bad Boys 2
(x) Joy Ride
(x) Lucky Number Slevin
(x) Ocean's Eleven
(x) Ocean's Twelve
(x) Bourne Identity
(x) Bourne Supremacy
( ) Lone Star
() Bedazzled
(x) Predator I
(x) Predator II
(x) The Fog
(x) Ice Age
(x) Ice Age 2: The Meltdown
() Curious George
Total so far: 101

(x) Independence Day
(x) Cujo
(x) A Bronx Tale
(x) Darkness Falls
(x) Christine
(x) ET
(x) Children of the Corn
() My Bosses Daughter
() Maid in Manhattan
(x) War of the Worlds
(x) Rush Hour
(x) Rush Hour 2
Total so far: 111

() Best Bet
() How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days
(x) She's All That
(x) Calendar Girls
() Sideways
(x) Mars Attacks
(x) Event Horizon
() Ever After
(x) Wizard of Oz
(x) Forrest Gump
(x) Big Trouble in Little China
(x) The Terminator
(x) The Terminator 2
(x) The Terminator 3
Total so far: 121

(x) X-Men
(x) X-2
(x) X-3
(x) Spider-Man
(x) Spider-Man 2
() Sky High
(x) Jeepers Creepers
(x) Jeepers Creepers 2
(x) Catch Me If You Can
(x) The Little Mermaid
(x) Freaky Friday
(x) Reign of Fire
(x) The Skulls
(x) Cruel Intentions
() Cruel Intentions 2
() The Hot Chick
(x) Shrek
(x) Shrek 2
Total so far: 136

() Swimfan
(x) Miracle on 34th street
() Old School
() The Notebook
(x) K-Pax
() Krippendorf's Tribe
(x) A Walk to Remember
(x) Ice Castles
(x) Boogeyman
() The 40-year-old Virgin
Total so far:141

(x) Lord of the Rings Fellowship of the Ring
(x) Lord of the Rings The Two Towers
(x) Lord of the Rings Return Of the King
(x) Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark
(x) Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom
(x) Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade
Total so far: 147

(x) Baseketball
(x) Hostel
() Waiting for Guffman
(x) House of 1000 Corpses
(x) Devils Reject
(x) Elf
(x) Highlander
(x) Mothman Prophecies
(x) American History X
() Three
Total so Far: 155

(x) The Jacket
(x) Kung Fu Hustle
() Shaolin Soccer
() Night Watch
(x) Monsters Inc.
(x) Titanic
(x) Monty Python and the Holy Grail
(x) Shaun Of the Dead
(x) Willard
Total so far: 162

(x) High Tension
() Club Dread
(x) Hulk
(x) Dawn Of the Dead
(x) Hook
(x) Chronicles Of Narnia: The Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe
(x) 28 days later
() Orgazmo
(x) Phantasm
(x) Waterworld
Total so far: 170

(x) Kill Bill vol 1
(x) Kill Bill vol 2
(x) Mortal Kombat
(x) Wolf Creek
() Kingdom of Heaven
(x) The Hills Have Eyes
() I Spit on Your Grave aka the Day of the Woman
(x) The Last House on the Left
(x) Re-Animator
(x) Army of Darkness
Total so far: 178

(x) Star Wars Ep. I The Phantom Menace
(x) Star Wars Ep. II Attack of the Clones
(x) Star Wars Ep. III Revenge of the Sith
(x) Star Wars Ep. IV A New Hope
(x) Star Wars Ep. V The Empire Strikes Back
(x) Star Wars Ep. VI Return of the Jedi
() Ewoks Caravan Of Courage
() Ewoks The Battle For Endor
Total so far: 184

(x) The Matrix
(x) The Matrix Reloaded
(x) The Matrix Revolutions
(x) Animatrix
(x) Evil Dead
(x) Evil Dead 2
(x) Team America: World Police
(x) Red Dragon
(x) Silence of the Lambs
(x) Hannibal
Total so far: 194

Now Add them up and...
Put "I've seen ... out of 239 films" in the subject line and repost it.

Hahahah! Ok, so yeah, I watch a lot of movies.

It's been cold here the last few days, an even bigger cold front is on the way, and man, do I feel it.
It's times like this that I wish that I had a pop up tv in my room so I could just lay there under my heavy and warm comforter, and watch tv or movies.
I don't even have a tv in my room, never mind a pop up tv, but it would be nice to have one with a dvd player or at least a vcr, so I could just lay there and watch till I fell asleep.
Every joint aches, every muscle is stiff, I just want it to stop but it's not going to until it warms up outside, and it won't be warm-er until maybe the weekend.
It kind of sucks.
I'm just so sick of being stiff and in pain because of the cold weather.
If I still lived back up north in Maine, they would have had to admit me to the hospital by now due to the never ending and excruciating pain that I'm in right now.
Blah.

I absolutely love music, I have it on and playing all day long even while the tv is on.
I use my headphones plugged into my speaker so I can hear it while I work online, and at night, I fall asleep listening to it on my mp3 player which is very similar to ipods.
I have a much cheaper mp3 player, but it works awesome, it's small, but has a large LCD, brightly lit display so that while I'm laying there in my pitch black room, I can read it and go through the music menu to get to a song I want to hear.

There are a lot of nights that I can't sleep at all, insomnia sets in, so I just lay there listening to music for hours and hours.
My body gets the rest it needs, and I get to be entertained and not so bored as the hours tick away and my my brain won't shut off.
I can't sit here all day long, I have to get up and move around, go lay down and stuff, or my body gets super stiff and sore.
I think that's why I love having an mp3 player so much. I don't have to have a big radio in my room and waking the teens up.
I can lay there and listen and not disturb anyone and still get the rest that I need. 

I feel like my belly is protruding, distended, puffed out because, well, this could very well be a TMI (too much information) post.
I'm constipated.
See, opiate pain relievers constipate you, there is no way around this other than to take some sort of stool softener.
I don't recommend taking a laxative if you have to take opiate pain relievers because laxatives work too well, and then you never get out of the bathroom, but you always forget to buy stool softeners until it's too late, until you're well on your way to full blown discomfort.
And every single time this happens, while I'm sitting there on the cold porcelain, I always, always, think of the movie Trainspotting, and the line the main character Mark "Rent-boy" Renton played by Ewan McGregor, narrates after he's decided to stop doing heroin and has had to settle for some morphine suppositories as his "last hit".

Mark "Rent-boy" Renton: [narrating] Heroin makes you constipated. The heroin from my last hit was fading, and the suppositories had yet to melt.
[moans loudly, doubles over]
Mark "Rent-boy" Renton: I'm no longer constipated.

The scene that follows is truly hysterical as he has to run and find a bathroom, and finds the worst toilet in all of Scotland.
It's a foul and disgusting scene, but as I'm sitting there in my bathroom scolding myself for not buying some Senocot or something, I think of that scene and laugh.

I don't know if this particular company is in business all over the country, it's probably only the south, or maybe even just Florida for all I know, but I get such a kick out of how they target their commercials for their cheap car insurance to different people.

I won't link it, but I'm sure if you've seen it, you'll know exactly which company I'm talking about.
They run 2 identical commercials, the same people, the exact same set-up, the exact same script, except when the actors say the name of the place, depending on what channel the commercial is airing on, the name of the company is different.
In 1 commercial when it's on say, channel 8, the really super awesome Tampa news station, which obviously has more money and a different viewer base, the actor says "Florida No Fault".
If it airs on channel CW44, which is definitely a different viewer base, younger, probably less money, the actor calls it Cash Register.
They call it 2 totally different company names based on the economic viewer base of the channel it airs on.
I find it totally hysterical that they do that, same actors, same script, same exact scene set-up, but 2 different names.

I have to wonder why a company would do that, but I guess the names make certain economic classes feel better when they go to purchase car insurance, they want to feel like they can afford it and will be treated appropriately when they go in to sign up for their cash insurance.

Eden Riegel, who plays Bianca Montgomery on ABC's All My Children soap, has a web series called Imaginary Bitches, and it is absolutely hysterical!
I just found it last night, but it's been online since May 2008 I think, and it will be going into it's second season this year.
Imaginary Bitches is about a girl named Eden, (Eden Riegel) who is single and all of her best friends are hooked up and in relationships.
None of them have any time for her anymore, and when they do have time to get together, all her 3 friends do is talk about their relationships and their boyfriends.
After Eden has an amazing one night stand, she calls all of her friends to talk about it like they all do after a night of mind blowing sex, but once again, they are all too busy to talk to her.
Suddenly, she has 2 new friends, imaginary friends, named Catherine and Heather, and they are total bitches.
These 2 new imaginary friends are more than just people to talk to, they end up becoming a major part of her life, they screw up new and potential relationships because she gets caught talking to them a few times.
When her real friends find out about it, they try to help in their own short and fast ways, but the whole thing is so freaking funny, I watched all 12 available episodes last night and laughed through every single one.

There are 13 episodes total, but one of them has been taken off line, episode 6, because it has been made into a short book.
Each episode is only between 5 and 9 minutes long, but you will love each of them, they are so damn funny.
It's ideal for all the single women out there who have friends who are in relationships, if you're single, you will totally relate to Eden's dilemma, being the only single friend, being left out of couples only dinner parties, couples only trips etc etc.
Eden does what most of us do when blown off by our hooked-up girl friends, we talk to ourselves about it, but she takes it a bit extreme and has real imaginary friends that never blow her off.
Check out the teaser below and if you like it and laugh, check out the other episodes, I swear I laughed my ass off watching all of them.
 

I absolutely love getting promotional items or products to review, winning contests, etc.

I have been watching the book club adventures of 4 girlfriends on the new CBS web-series called Novel Adventures.
They ran a few small trivia contests on their Twitter, and I was one of the winners!
What did I win?

I won an autographed cd from singer Keaton Simons.
His music was featured in one of their episodes, and since I've been watching the series, I knew the answer to the trivia question.
The cd came today, and it is soo good.
I love it!

I am well prepared to be called closed-minded, hateful toward Christians, and it might even be said that by writing this, that I am attacking Christians, but I am actually physically sick to my stomach after watching this movie.

I just finished watching Horton Hears a Who with Sebastian, and I went into it thinking it would be like the 72-page book, that the story would be the same.
Dr. Seuss gave us several themes or messages in Horton Hears a Who.
One was that we are all the same, all people, and we must take care of those of us who need to be cared for, more vulnerable than ourselves, to protect them from prejudice and harm.
That if we make a promise, we must keep it, that no matter how small each of us is, that we are important, that there comes a time one must do something to help oneself, and finally, every citizen in a community is important for the town's well-being.
And this story also touched on how big our universe really is, that we may not be the only planet with life, that we are just a speck in the universe, we are so so small, when we look out there in the deep space field, there are millions of universes, we might not be the only ones with life.
The speck on Horton's clover represents that.

The film follows the original story very closely, but it's how they fleshed out the story to fit a full length movie that is truly disturbing.
It was a 72-page book, it could maybe have been done as an animated short like some of Pixar's other animated shorts, but they wanted to make it a full lentgh film, so they fleshed out a whole bunch of new stuff that was just downright scary.
The movie tells us that the kangaroo is the leader, what she says goes, and in the original story, she does not come anywhere near saying all of the things she does in the movie.      
 Almost as soon as Kangaroo started ranting about it just being a speck with no life on it, can't hear it, see it, feel it, destroy it, I felt sick.

Kangaroo is a very unpleasant characterization of atheists, she rages on in the movie, something else she does not do at all in the book.
Kangaroo believes that Horton is a menace, a sick influence on the children, that he must be stopped for his belief that life exists in a speck on the clover.
Horton is not telling anyone that they have to believe, he isn't teaching the children anything, he is simply trying to keep his promise to the Mayor to take them to a safe place.
They turned this loving and warm story about taking care of each other and doing our part, being a part of our huge universe full of all kinds of life, into a right-wing anti-atheist attack with some heavy religious tones.

The dimwitted Mayor was the only one who could hear Horton, he tried to explain that Horton was the giant elephant in the sky, he's so big, that none of the Whos could see him or hear him, but he's there!
The mayor swears it to all of the Whos of Who-ville!
Trust him, trust in Horton!
And not only is he there, but he's the only one who can save them!!
No one will listen to him though, they don't believe him when he says that Horton can and will save them, only the Mayor knows of their impending doom or safety, and he's repeatedly called a "boob" for his beliefs.
In Who-ville, the city council refuses to listen to the Mayor and his warnings that their world is in serious trouble, that they could all die.
They scoff at him, tell him he's finished, that no one believes him and no one will support him.
 None of that is even hinted at in the original story!
The city council doesn't believe in the voice in the sky, and they also want to punish the Mayor for his beliefs.
The annual event will go on as planned, and they literally kick him out of the council meeting.
 No one at all in Who-ville believes in a single word the Mayor has said about Horton, the big voice in the sky, everything will go on as planned, everything is just fine.
Even as Horton shows the Mayor that he is really there by sticking the clover in and out of the shade, the Mayor is the only one who notices it, everyone else just goes on as if nothing is happening.

Horton is the only one who believes in the Whos, he's the only one who can hear them, and everyone else in the jungle thinks he's crazy, so they, under the leadership of the very angry atheist kangaroo, set out to hunt him down, tie him up, and persecute him for his beliefs.
The kangaroo is portrayed as an evil atheist, wanting to destroy the clover and it's possible inhabitants because she can't see them, hear them, feel them, because she has no proof that they exist, it's just a speck, and therefore it must be destroyed and Horton must be punished for his beliefs.
What if others start believing it too?
What if others start hearing the voices too?!
The clover must be destroyed to stop that!

Atheists are often accused of wanting to destroy religion, of persecuting Christianity and Christians.
What's funny is that atheists are the most hated and mistrusted group in the entire world.
 Atheists are more despised than gays and Muslims.
I feel like that by me saying any of this makes me sound just like the kangaroo, that I'm an evil atheist making an absurd claim about this movie, but I have always loved the writings of Dr. Seuss, I read all of his wonderful and ambiguous stories to my kids hundreds of times when they were young.
The books were well loved by millions of people around the world and interpreted by those same millions to fit what they want to see, (Antiabortionists, for instance, love that "a person is a person, no matter how small" line.) but this adaptation really does flesh out a whole lot more than what Seuss could ever have possibly imagined it would.
It clearly shows that believers are persecuted by evil atheists all of the time, that atheists are out to destroy religion, and punish those that believe in it.
 
Atheists are not out to persecute anyone, we don't want to destroy religion, and we certainly do not want to imprison and punish believers in any way.
I personally do not want to see any religion destroyed, but I would like to see more peace, the very thing most religions are based upon.
The god(s) taught love, peace, and understanding, and my wish is that more believers would practice what they preach instead of being so intolerant to anyone who does not believe and live their lives exactly as they do.
That goes for all of the various religions, each one claims that their god is the right god, that their rules are the right rules, and most religions teach peace, love, understanding, and to love your fellow man, yet it so very rarely happens.
Instead we fight, we yell, we call each other names, we choose to punish those who do not live exactly as we do.
I feel that religion has it's place in our world, it always has, and it often does so much good for so many, but it also has caused more wars and deaths than for any other reason.
People can say it's a war for oil and for freedom and democracy, but we wouldn't be in it if one group didn't feel that we are infidels, and if we didn't feel that our god looks over us and blesses only our nation.
 
It is a shame that the director and producers chose to go this route with Horton, the film itself is gorgeous to look at, the animation is simply beautiful, but the very deep hatred and attack on atheists is glaring and ugly.

Once again, I have insomnia, and I was thinking about going to bed, at least laying there trying to sleep, but as usual I found others things to occupy my non-sleeping brain.
I found a pretty cool electronics blog to check out, it talks about all kinds of electronics, computers, video games, lots of stuff, and then a movie I love came on, so now I really can't sleep.

No matter how many times I have watched Independence Day I have to watch it every single time it's on.
It sucks that it started at 2am though.
I have insomnia anyway, but I was going to try and sleep, but if I go in there now, I'll be all "but that scene with Will Smith punching out the alien is coming up, and the fireball, and the oh crap when the dude is stuck in his car, and the stupid people on the roof of the building with big signs", and then I'll have to come back out here anyway.
My brain won't shut up long enough to try and let me sleep, and that sucks.
So I guess I'm going to be up until this movie goes off.
My brain, it just won't turn off for anything.

We watch a lot of movies here, all kinds, but some of our favorite genres are of the mobster/hitman/violent and dark humor kind.
Most of these kinds of movies take place in Las Vegas, but the one we watched tonight, took place in Belgium.
In Bruges to be exact.
That's the title of the movie too.

In Bruges stars Colin Farrell, Brendan Gleeson, and Ralph Fiennes.
Ken (Gleeson) and Ray (Farrell), are 2 hitmen who have been told to go to Bruges and lay low by their mob boss Harry (Fiennes) after a mishap with their last target, a priest.
When Ray shot the priest, a stray bullet struck and killed a little boy.
Trying to avoid the 2 men from getting caught, he sends them off to Bruges while awaiting any news stories or police investigation into the death of the little boy.

Now you're probably thinking, Kat, how can any of that be darkly humorous? A little boy was killed, and so was a priest!
Well you're right, none of that part of the movie is funny, and Ray does feel tremendous guilt over what he's done, but the dark comedy comes in during the conversations that Ken and Ray have with each other and with other people they meet in Bruges.
Ken loves it there, Ray thinks it's a total shit-hole, but they have drinks at the pub, they see a movie being filmed with a midget (Jordan Prentice) who also becomes Ray's friend, and Ray also finds a love interest in a beautiful blond drug dealer (Clémence Poésy).
There's a bit of drinking, a bit of drugging, a man is struck blind by a blank bullet fired at close range, and just some truly off the wall things are said and done which make it funny.

It also has some very serious and touching moments, the ending is quite dramatic, makes you feel and care for all of the main characters, and gives you some good insight to who each of our main characters are.
Harry (mob boss) had a reason for sending Ken and Ray to Bruges, and it wasn't just to lay low.
Harry feels that no one can kill a child and get away with it, states if he ever killed a child, even by accident as Ray had done, he would shoot himself on the spot without hesitation.
Bruges is like a fairy tale place to him, he wanted to send Ray to a sort of fairy tale place before he died for the killing of the child, a place of happiness before dying.
Bruges is a hell on earth for Ray, a hell which he wants to get out of desperately if he lives through the 2 weeks they have been ordered to stay there, and the end leaves all of them in Bruges facing their lives choices.

This is not an easy movie to watch if violence on screen is not your thing, but I found the film really enjoyable, funny in some parts, teary in others, and it left me feeling that each of our 3 main characters were all in Bruges for more than the initial reason, but to face themselves and to better themselves in some way.

My surgeon wasn't there today, he was in surgery, but I saw one of the other surgeons and also spoke to his nurse Cindy, about the revision surgery.
I explained all of what's been going on with me, and the whole choking to death when I puke issue, and she agreed that we need to do this ASAP.

She asked me what I was doing in the next couple of weeks, and I told her spending Christmas with my sons, but I'm totally on a free schedule after the 1st of the year.
She said ok, said she'd talk to him about it, get his nurse Cindy up to speed, and Cindy will also talk with him about it, and then she'll call me with a date for the revision surgery.

I'm so freaking happy!!!!!
I know when, well sorta, it will be either in January or February, and it will also be back at the hospital I had my A/P spine fusion at in 2006, Mease Countryside.
No more icky, horrible, super religious St. Joseph's Hospital in Tampa.
Yay!
This makes me way happy for a number of reasons, and I'll post about them at some point.
Things happened during my surgery at St. Joe's, and also the staff there was just really bad.
In ICU, the nurses were so freaking fantastic, but when you have several ICU nurses tell you they are trying everything they can to keep you in ICU as long as possible because once moved over to the women's floor, "You won't be cared for properly", speaks volumes about the kind of care the nursing staff provides over there, and they were right, a world of difference in the care received.

But anyway, we left the doc's with good news, and then came back down here and went and did a little grocery shopping, and I almost choked at how much milk Mindy's family goes through every week.
3 gallons!
OMG! I would flip out if I had to buy that much milk every week at $3.99 per gallon.
We go through a single half gallon a week, if I buy a gallon, it ends up going bad before it's at the halfway mark.

Then I came home and started looking for my external tape drives or hard drives thingy, whatever it's called, that I had tucked away in a drawer. I have some files stored on it that I need for my medical stuff from that surgery in 2006, but I can't find the dang thing.
That means one of two things.
I either put it in the giant box of spare computer parts, keyboards, monitors, internal hard drives, and other assorted computer stuff, that's in the closet, or I tossed it out in the trash when I ditched some computer towers about 8 months or so ago.
I really hope it's in the giant box of parts, I need those files.
Ack!

Ok, off to eat dinner and watch The Dark Knight  with the teens.
Later days!

It's the holidays, and there are tons of great classic movies and specials being shown on tv as we quickly approach Christmas, just 17 days to go now. (including today)
One of my most favorite, and quite possibly one of the funniest holiday skits ever written, was for Saturday Night Live.
It was a recurring skit on SNL called the Delicious Dish, it was a parody of public broadcast radio shows.
It starred Ana Gasteyer as Margaret-Jo McCullen who used the phrase "good times" over and over, and Molly Shannon as Teri Rialto, two very bland radio personalities as the radio show hosts.
The guest star for the night was Alec Baldwin.
He played a character named Pete Schweddy, owner of Season's Eatings Bakery, and one of his best products were his balls, a sexual double entendre referring to testicles.

This skit kills me every single time I watch it.
I laugh as soon as it starts, I laugh until tears are streaming down my face, it is just so damn funny.
How the 3 of them did not laugh through this skit, I have no idea.
I seriously crack up as soon as it starts,  all the "mmm, balls, tell us about your balls Pete, mmm, your balls are so soft and moist Pete", has me rolling as soon as it starts.

Please make sure that there are no children in the room or within hearing/viewing distance before you click on the link below.
Headphones may be a really good idea if you do not want your kids to hear any of it accidentally.
Also, if you are the type of person who gets offended by sexual double entendre, just don't click it.
If you do click it and get offended, if your kids accidentally hear it, do not complain to me.
You have been sufficiently warned.

Ladies and gentlemen, I give to you, Pete Schweddy's Balls .

I'm really starting to get annoyed with Walgreen's pharmacy crappy customer service.
I have been a customer for 11 years, I have been taking narcotic pain relievers for 10 of those 11 years, and getting them filled at multiple branches of their stores.
Sometimes I've gone to my closest and most frequented branch, and they won't have my med, so they call another one, and then I have to go pick up my med at that other branch, but I have always had my scripts filled with them unless there is an issue with the computers, the insurance, or they don't have my med in stock.
I'm a faithful customer thanks to my scoliosis and surgeries.

But here's what happened today.
My sister came down to take me to one branch of Walgreen's that always has a particular pain med in stock, my niece Skye was going to stay here with the teens while we went, but it should have only taken us 30 minutes tops, and I would have been able to come back and at least spend 20-30 minutes with Skye, see her smile, laugh, and fall in love with the stop motion classic Christmas movies I have.
The only movie the girls have seen is Frosty the Snowman, but I have all of the old classics, Rudolph, Santa Claus is coming to Town, and The Little Drummer Boy.
I bought them on VHS about 15 years ago, when my boys were just babies, and we have watched them every year at xmas.
It's far better to watch them on VHS when you have small kids instead of broadcast television, there are no stupid commercials in between.

Anyway, we were only supposed to be gone a half hour, tops, but after dropping my script off, being told it would be about 20 minutes, wandering around Walgreen's and buying stuff, the pharmacy tech tells me they can't fill my script for the oxys on a Saturday because they have to confirm the script with my surgeon, not his on call doctor.
I asked if this is a new policy, because I have been filling this script at their store almost every single month, on either a Saturday or a Sunday because my surgeon mails it out on Thursday, and I usually always get it on Saturday and fill it.
He said no, not a new policy, so I asked him to check last month's fill date and look up what day it was because I know it was a Saturday.
He checks, confirms that yup, it was filled on a Saturday but shouldn't have been, and now he has to report that tech for filling it on a weekend without speaking to the prescribing doctor.

So now I'm pissed, I don't have my pain meds and I need to have them because my lower dose pain meds will not be filled until Monday, and there is simply no way that I can go the weekend without the pain meds.
I cannot move without them, I can't eat or I get sick, I get wicked leg and back spasms, basically, my body goes into withdrawals, and let me tell you, it is not a pretty sight or a fun experience to go through pain med withdrawals.
You get very, very ill, very quickly, like as soon as they wear off, your body starts withdrawals and it is quite painful, and getting med sick is probably the most agonizing thing to experience.
I hate the withdrawals, and whenever we finally do decide to take me off all of the pain meds, if my doctors ever do decide to take me off of them, I will have to be given some type of help with weaning off of them, possibly even rehab because of how severe the withdrawals are.

My sister knows this, and so she asks me if there is any other pharmacy I can go to that won't have the same Saturday policy, so we head down to the Publix out on Bee Ridge and Cattlemen, and they had absolutely no problem filling them because I've been a customer there before, and the neck brace and downward facing head kinda give it away that I have a legitimate need to have the medicine.
They filled it, but it's now been another 40 minutes, we've now been gone for a little over an hour, much longer than we wanted to be gone, and my sister needs to take me home, pick up Skye, and go home herself.
She has things to do in her own life that don't involve her having to drive me to multiple pharmacies in the city because Walgreen's decided to be dickheads today.
She came down here from way up in north Bradenton, to specifically take me to get my meds.
It takes her about 30 minutes to get from her house to mine, and she was doing this as a favor to me because she knows I need the meds and don't have transportation all of the time.

When we got back here, Sebastian had already watched Santa Claus is coming to Town with Skye, she loved it just as I knew she would, I didn't get to take any pictures of her, hug her, play with her, nothing.
I very rarely get to see my nieces because of how far away from us they live, so time is very precious when they do come over, and thanks to Walgreen's being dickheads today, I missed out on another good visit with my niece.
 
I know that Walgreen's has filled this particular script on the weekends plenty of times before, not just last month, but for the last 3 months, since my surgery, and actually, well before that too because my pain doc also gives me this same exact med every month.
It pisses me off that they wasted my time.
They confirmed they had it in stock, said they would fill it, made me wait 20 minutes, then tell me they won't fill it even though they have been filling it every single month on a weekend before.
If they do indeed have a policy to not fill a certain class narcotic on the weekends, he should have never told me that they would fill the script.
He said absolutely nothing to me about having to speak to the prescribing doctor.
I'm going to just switch all of my meds over to Publix pharmacies because of this crap, and let them have all of my business from now on which is a whole lot.
I take 3 different narcotic pain meds every month, 1 blood pressure med, 1 heart med, 2 different muscle relaxers, and an antibiotic every month.
I spend a great deal of money on medications, some covered by insurance and some not.
One of my pain meds is not covered, and it costs me $238.00 every month to fill it, and the covered ones still have co-pays, so I spend about $350 per month on just the co-pay medications, the non-covered one is $238.00, and not to mention all of the general shopping I do while I wait for them to be filled which can vary from just a few dollars up to about $100 if they have things I can't get elsewhere, or don't feel like getting elsewhere.
If it isn't dumb shit like this so-called policy, it's downed computers, not being able to contact the insurance companies, refusing to fill because the insurance on file was mistyped by one of their own staff, all kinds of problems, so I'll just switch to a Publix pharmacy that I know doesn't have any of these issues, give them my business and my money, and Walgreen's can go fuck themselves.

So I'm watching Fringe, and the lead character, Olivia, is back in the isolation tank trying to erase the shared memories she has with an old boyfriend who was an alter-agent kind of person.
Anyway, every time I see the tank, I'm reminded of the movie Altered States with William Hurt.
Great movie by the way.
But every time she gets in it, her life is in danger and I wonder just how much  term life insurance the FBI provides it's agents.
Like, if she dies in the tank, would they pay out to her family?
She didn't go in it on orders, she went in on her own free will, but still, she's on the clock working the case.
I dunno why, but I think of weird stuff like that when I watch this show.

The FedEx guy just knocked on the door a few minutes ago to drop off a product for me to review.
I hollered through the door, "Please just set it there, I'm sick, you might catch it", and you should have seen the guy drop it and haul ass back to his truck.
It was quite funny.
But honestly, I am not feeling well.
I have the coughing, sneezing, sniffling, and some stomach issues.
Not really stomach sick, no puke or poops, but more of this weird feeling.
I feel hollow in my chest and stomach areas, I can't really explain it beyond that, but it's a hollow feeling, empty, and eating doesn't make it go away.

I have some minor stuff to clean up around here, some pots and pans from food we did eat and then just couldn't deal with after we ate, and I need to do the floors too.
All I really want to do though is sleep or at least lay down and be totally lazy.

Tonight for our nightly dinner and a show, the teens and I watched the most bad-ass movie I have seen in a long time, Stuck.
It stars Mena Suvari (American Beauty) unforgettably stars as Brandi, a hard-partying, overworked nursing assistant in this delicious, darkly humorous psychological thriller from director Stuart Gordon (Re-Animator, From Beyond). Brandi accidentally steers her car into a homeless man, movingly played by Stephen Rea (The Crying Game), sending him flying through the windshield. Not wanting to jeopardize a possible job promotion, she chooses not to get him medical help, leaving him clinging to life in her garage. But soon her psyche begins to unravel as captor and captive are pitted against each other in a bloody...even outrageous battle for survival. Director Stuart Gordon delivers what Variety called "ingeniously nasty and often shockingly funny" entertainment.

I saw this movie under new releases on Netflix, and after reading the above synopsis, I decided it might be worth the viewing.
Oh how right I was!
This movie is dark, it's violent, but hysterically funny at the same time.
The teens and I laughed out loud multiple times while watching it, and we simply couldn't believe how far Brandi was willing to go to try and get that job promotion.
Nothing, and I mean nothing, including a dying man in her car's windshield, was going to screw up her plans to get ahead at work for a supervisor who constantly asked too much of her, and the other employees as well.
The supervisor held the promotion over her head in such a twisted way, that Brandi seemed to have no choice but to keep the dying man in her car, in her garage, at any and all costs.
If you like deeply twisted movies, dark comedies, you have to see this movie.
It has become one of my favorite movies of 2008 after just 1 viewing.

I love movies, I love seeing them in the theater, but I can't stand sitting in the theater.
The seats, no matter how nice the theater is with their seats that recline back, the extra over stuffed cushions, and the cushioned arm rests, it doesn't matter, it is far too painful for me to sit in one of the seats for 2 hours.
So I wait and wait, I add them to my Netflix queue using the saved feature for whenever it gets released to DVD, and I continue to watch almost every new released DVD I can with Netflix.
I am home 24/7, so I watch movies and blog.
So here's my list of upcoming theater releases that I will be adding to my saved Netflix queue.

Star Trek  I like all the Star Trek movies and shows.
Friday the 13th  is a remake, but doesn't look too bad. Plus, it has the hottie Jared Padalecki in it. W00t!
Timecrimes  I can deal with subtitles if the story is good enough. This one looks interesting.
Seven Pounds  It looks interesting too.
The Lodger 
Transporter 3  I liked the first two.
The Alphabet Killer  Based on a true story. Looks decent.
Up  I LOVE Pixar movies! Yay!
Angels & Demons  I loved the book, and Tom Hanks is back portraying Robert Langdon again.
My Bloody Valentine in 3D I loved the original movie which came out in 1981. It was probably the very first slasher film I ever saw. I was 11 years old and my passion for horror movies began.
Let the Right One In  A foreign vampire movie where the vampire is a young girl. Coolness.
The Unborn Oooooh, this looks good!
Plague Town  Looks kinda scary. Yay!
My Name is Bruce  Haha! I LOVE Bruce Campbell. He's playing himself in a movie about himself.
The Uninvited   Another remake of Japanese horror movies. Looks pretty decent.
Twilight  I've never read the books, (OMG!) but I love vampire stuff, so yeah, I'd like to see it.
The Haunting In Connecticut  Ooooh, another scary based on a true story movie.
And finally, Sunshine Cleaning  A movie about cleaning up crime scenes like murders, suicides etc. This is the exact line of work my sister in law heather does and she loves it, plus it pays awesome.

I'm still not feeling all that great, so I thought I'd do a quick review of all of the movies we've watched in the last 2 months from our Netflix account.
And when I say quick, I mean like really short reviews, one sentence each.

Sex and the City: The Movie - I really enjoyed this one, didn't think I was going to, but ended up liking it a lot.
Kung Fu Panda - I LOVED this one. Animated movies are really cool.
War, Inc. - John Cusack flick, very entertaining.
Indiana Jones/Kingdom of the Crystal Skull - I was really disappointed. Not my fave one of all the Indiana movies.
The Happening - Freaking stupid.
Starship Troopers - Sebastian wanted to see this one.
Iron Man - Great movie, heavy action, liked it.
Smart People - Never watched it, returned it. 
Saw IV - I enjoyed the gore. 
White Noise - Stupid, hated it.
Street Kings - We liked it. 
Pathology - Kinda stupid.
Evolution - The teens rented this while I was in the hospital. They like it.
The Breakfast Club - Classic 80's flick.
Martian Child - Excellent John Cusack movie. Must see IMO.
Harold and Kumar...Guantanamo Bay - I freaking hate these movies, but the teens liked it.
The Bank Job - Pretty decent action flick.
The Secret - Really very interesting movie. You should watch it.
Vantage Point - Pretty decent action movie.
The Ruins - Not too bad for a horror movie.
Doomsday - Stupid.
Definitely, Maybe - Cute romance story.
Stop-Loss - Pretty decent war/soldier story.
The Tattooist- Pretty good horror flick, nothing too gorey, but good story.

What song is that from?
Anyway, I do think it's going to rain either tonight or tomorrow at some point.
The pain has been almost unbearable today, and it usually gets like this when there's a storm on the way.

Speaking of storms, I was laying down under a blanket trying to get my joints all warmed up and watching daytime tv shows.
I was watching the soap All My Children, and they all just nailed with a huge tornado that wiped out like half the town.
Like everybody is dead or dying.
I bet my parents are watching this.
They've been watching this show for years and years.

I need to go get some small shipping boxes, small but big enough for like 4-6 books, and then get the teens to mail it out, take it to the post office and ship it to a friend from the local Florida forums.
I have all of these books that I just don't have the time to read, and this friend has been out of work for a long time now due to some health issues, and she's been reading a new book approximately every 3 days.
Books are expensive, but she asked for recommendations, and that's when I told her that I had a ton of books she could have for free, just give me a mailing address.
She agreed, so I need to get them packed up and sent out.

I'm having a day here.
I'm on some hefty restrictions, no lifting anything at all, no doing laundry or cleaning or cooking anything that would make me have to bend over etc, but I have stuff that needs to be done and well, it isn't getting done.
And then there's the sitting/laying down restriction.
I am allowed to sit for 20 minutes every 4 hours and then lay down again.
It's boring and the tv is on a low stand, so it's hard to entertain myself with movies or tv shows. What I need is one of those tv lifts things on a remote, so I can get it to the perfect height for me while I lay on the couch.

And I'm feeling overwhelmed by the generosity of the people who are donating money to me for the boobiethon.
I still feel bad about not being able to donate my time this year, it's just something I've done that makes me feel good, and to not be able to do it this year is making me feel bad.
I can't help it, I just feel bad that I can't help this year.
But next year, I'll be right on it, back editing photos every day and helping spread the word as much as I can.
I usually also send in my photo every year, and I can't do that this year either.
I have a stitch line under my right breast from the chest tube I had to have, and I'm still covered in the sticky stuff from all of the tape and heart monitor things, all over my whole upper body.
Basically, my chest looks like crap and I'm not comfortable sending in a pic like that.
I'm not super vain, but I don't think anyone would want to see all that tape and the stitches with a big nasty scab on it too.
I can't send in a covered pic either.
I haven't been able to put a bra on since the day I went in for surgery, September 8th.
It hurts to even put on a clean t-shirt, and I did try to put a bra on, but it was a total no go, total wicked bad pain shot through my upper back and shoulders.

Anyway, I wanted to hop on here and say thank you to everyone who is donating money to me and the boobiethon, you're doing an awesome thing, and if you haven't donated yet, do it.
Save the boobies!

The teens and I watched Street Kings tonight, a Keanu Reeves cop/action thriller, and it was really good.
It has a top notch cast, Reeves, Forrest Whitaker, Hugh Laurie, Chris Evans, Cedric the entertainer, Jay Mohr and John Corbett to name a few.

Quite a few people on the local forums said it was really good, my sister and her husband also said it was, so I Netflixed it and the teens and I watched it tonight.
I'm still not typing all that well, but my review is in the link posted.

Now I'm off to watch Pathology starring Milo Ventimiglia of Heroes, and check it out.
It got 3.5 stars out of 5 on both Amazon and Netflix, so it shouldn't be too bad.
I'll review it if I can when we're done watching it.
My typing still sucks and my brain is all muddled, so my reviews are not exactly great, but I know a good movie when I see one, same with the bad, and I'd never tell anyone to watch something that really sucks.

The ac unit is mostly done.
Mindy, her husband Chris, and her son Jeff, were here all day long fixing the ac unit.
Chris removed the old unit and holding stuff, then cut all new wood, installed that, and then put in the new ac unit.
The old hole in the wall was far too big for the ac, so all the wood was used to make it fit, to hold it in place better with no gaps.
He used some of that expanding caulk to help keep it all insulated and stuff, and then next weekend, he's going to come over and repair the drywall where the ac unit is.
It has to be taken out, it's rotted from all the times the ac leaked water and it ran down the walls.
I paid for all the supplies and he's doing the installation.
My landlord will let me take the work off the rent, it totally saves him from having to do it, he'll be happy that it got done.

Mark helped out too, he knocked down a ton of hornets nests and also helped put the ac unit in while Chris was outside pulling it through to sit the way it's supposed to.
Sebastian couldn't help much with that, he's allergic to hornet's stings, and Mark did get stung 3 times, so yeah, it's a good thing Sebastian didn't try to help.
But he did go to the store and get some stuff we needed.
It's going to take a few hours for the house to cool down, there was no ac on all day and a huge gaping hole in the wall all day long so it will probably get cool in here by midnight. LOL

I'm so tired now so it's also a good thing my sis had something come up for tonight, I am in no mood to have more to do tonight.
She's going to come tomorrow and help me with my hair, maybe do some lunch or dinner depending on what time she comes over.

I have a couple of movies that I can watch tonight from the lazy comfort of my couch.
I have Street Kings and Pathology, it's a reason to be lazy and not do anymore than I already have today.
Oh yeah, Chris also hooked up the HDTV antenna for me.
It's pulling a few channels, but my local ones still are not coming in like they should.
I'm hopeful that come February when the switch gets made, that all of those stations come in like they should.

Ok, off to find something to eat and watch a movie.
Later days.

I gave myself a scare last night.
See, I have bolt wounds on the side of my head from where I was bolted to the table during surgery, (I promise I will explain how it all went soon) and the nurse had cleaned them really good yesterday and put some Staphaseptic on them.
Well last night I reached up to the left side of my head to rub my temples, they sorta ache a bit, and this chunky thing came off in my fingers.
It was sort of like a scab but yellow-ish in color, and had some small hairs attached to it.
I didn't scratch it, I just rubbed my temples, and to have this thing fall off, it was really gross.
Then it started bleeding and it wouldn't stop, so I had Sebastian do his best to put a band-aid on it.
The nurse came today and took the band-aid off, cleaned it, and said it looked good, but man, it was super scary having it bleed like that.

I had ordered the new HDTV antenna that I need to be able to watch tv with the converter box, and it came today.
It's much much bigger than I thought it was, it really needs to be mounted outside, but I tried to hook it up today anyway.
Bad idea.
It's too heavy, I couldn't get it to work, it probably does need to be mounted outside on the wood shutters, and so yeah, by the time I gave up on it and put it back in the box, I had really over done it and now I'm paying for it.
 But there is a good thing about doing that, something pulled in my neck and now my head is staying up much better, straighter I think. hahahaha
Maybe I pulled the muscles where they need to go?
Don't know.
The pain is subsiding a bit now and I need to eat something.

Oh, speaking of eating, I sent the boys grocery shopping with a list and everything today.
They came back with a ton of wrong items, items not on the list, and a whole bunch of items that were on the list, didn't get bought at all.
They tried I suppose, this is a lot of pressure on them, I know that, so I really can't complain too too much that they screw things up a little bit.

You have no idea how hard it is to just lay down and relax, to stay relaxed.
I'm a single mom, there's things that I should be doing like laundry, dishes, cooking meals, and I simply can't.
I spend all my time either on my couch watching the tube or trying to be on line answering emails.
I can't sit here long though, like 20 minutes tops, and then I have to go lay down for hours.
It really kinda sucks.

But I did talk to my doctor's nurse, Cindy, today about the brace, they are calling the brace people to see about getting a custom fit brace for me because of how short my neck is, and because the ones they make simply are far too big for me.
It will be really nice to have a brace that fits.

Not much else is going on, nothing can be, so back to the couch I go.
Gossip Girl is on.
Later days.

Was talking with Shell about the teens going up to Maine for the summer to work at Funtown.
Season is the opposite here, and Funtown cannot get teens to work there anymore, so Shell was thinking about me sending the boys up there, they could stay with her during the week because she literally lives right down the street, and then stay with my folks on the weekends, and also visit with Great Gram and Aunty Heather the whole summer, and they'd be making money etc.
It's a cool idea because they'd get to visit with all the grandparents the entire summer, make paychecks, and have fun working at an amusement park.

Funtown has not changed at all in all of these years.
I went to their site and looked at the attractions, and they still have all of the same rides and stuff they had when I was a kid.
They have added some new stuff, but all of the old and fun rides I rode as a kid are still there.

One of the coolest ones that is still there and has been since 1976, is the Astrosphere.
This is just a Scrambler ride, but it's inside a dome that displays weird and semi-scary images on the dome, has a laser light show, and has played the exact same song since 1976, "Fire on High" by ELO. (Electric Light Orchestra)
This ride is famous, everyone in all of New England knows this ride, people wait in line for hours to get on and ride it, and it is so cool to me that it is still there.
Check out this video that someone made of it and put up on youtube.


 

Tomorrow, er, today, I have my pre-surgery consult with Doctor M.
He's going to tell me exactly what he and his team will do during the surgery, how long I'll be asleep, breathing tube, ICU, how many days to expect, (I'm holding him to 4!) what kind of pain to expect, what they'll have me do upon waking, physical therapy, etc, all of the nitty gritty details.

I have my own questions too.
Can I bring and wear my own clothes on like day 2 or something, will I be able to put my contacts back in, (I don't have a pair of glasses to wear) is this going to cause me to start a surprise menstrual cycle like the last surgery did, and if so, can I bring my own gear this time, or are they just going to make me lay there on a "pee pad" like last time.

Will they be shaving off any of my hair from the back of my head?
I know they are going to have to shave a portion of my neck, I have really long hair, I know it comes down far on my neck, so when they shave that, will they have to go any higher?
And if so, please don't fuck it up and make it incredibly noticeable to people.
My hair has been falling out anyway, but I really don't want to lose a lot if they can help it any.

I don't know if I posted about my hair situation or not, but this whole neck thing has been the cause of a lot of my health problems over the last year, year and a half.
With the spinal cord being pinched off, it can't send the right messages from my brain to all of my organs.
The messages are being pinched off, not sent, or sent incorrectly to all of my organs.
All of my stomach and digestive issues, being sick for no real reason, (I don't really go anywhere to catch any germs or viruses) my skin smelling really, horribly bad after eating certain foods, stomach pain, cramps, constipation, or the complete opposite, having days where regardless how many showers I took, how much deodorant I put on, I would have body odor, and my hair falling out.

Everyone loses hair on a daily basis, but this isn't normal hair loss, this is clumps of hair coming out in the shower, coming out when I brush it, coming out when the wind blows.
I don't have any noticeable bald spots, yet, but it's definitely thinned out.
It's nowhere near as thick as it once was, and it's not due to getting old, this is directly related to my neck stuff.
It's been rather sucky.

Sebastian broke down last night.
He just exploded in this 15 year old ball of fear, worry, and anger over this whole thing, crying, screaming, hugging me so tightly I thought he'd break my ribs.
He said if doc screws up and I die, he's going to beat him up really bad right there in the hallway at the hospital.
Mark said Sebastian won't get the chance, because he'll kill him.
To say the teens are starting to panic and be really afraid now, is an understatement.
They keep saying little things, '1 week from today' or 'I hope this week goes by really slow, it may be the last week I ever see you', or 'on Saturday or Sunday night, I'm sleeping with you, I want to be near you as much as possible.'
They even came out tonight and watched the season premiere of Gossip Girl, a show they hate, just to "hang out" with me.

I keep trying to reassure them that it's all going to be ok, that I WILL be coming home, that I'm going to be fine, and Sebastian wanted me to promise him that, but I can't.
I can't make that kind of promise because I really don't know.
I just kept telling him that I will be coming home, that it will be ok, without saying the word promise.

I have so much to do this week, work, the house, helping them with school, still trying to keep this house running as normally as possible, but honestly, I can't focus on any of it for long.
I want to though, I have things that I need to get done, but my mind starts wandering, racing, then my heart starts racing and pounding, and then I get a massive migraine and have to go lay down.
I went to bed shortly after the boys did tonight, they went at 11:30, I went at 11:45, and I laid there checking to make sure their alarm would go off, that mine would go off again at 8am so I can get up and try and do some work before I have to leave at noon-ish, but I started panicking about it all, so I got up and set Snoozester to call me at 8am just in case my cell alarm doesn't go off.
And now here I am, sitting here blogging, awake again, just thinking about it all.

I know things will be ok, but now with such short time left to go, I just want to go do it, get it over with, enough of the testing and appointments, and talks, let's just do it!
I just want it done so I can come back home like I said, that's all I want.

We are being barraged here (the whole country probably is) with constant reminders about the change to all digital broadcasting in February 2009, and seeing as today was a holiday, ABC ran a half hour infomercial about the switch and the converter boxes.
They said that if you bought a newer model tv, it should already be ready for the HDTV and LCD broadcast signals, and to just get an LCD mount for it on your wall, and you should be good to go.
That it should be ready and all good to go to pick up all the new digital signals.

Well I don't have money for the new tvs, and I already have the converter box and an amplified antenna, but it's not picking up the signals due to our house being made of concrete.
I need to either get a roof mount antenna, or one that can be mounted on the wooden shutters, but I think I might try a different idea.

I am going to buy a Philips Amplified UHF/VHF/HDTV Antenna, and mount it on the inside of my front windows.
It's flat, and it will only need to pick up the signal through the glass, not the concrete.
That may work.
If not, I'll mount it on the outside, attach it to the shutters, and run the cable through the front windows and screen, and hook it to the converter box.
I'm hoping that will work because all of the other indoor/outdoor antennas I've seen, are freaking huge, and I don't want a huge antenna on the front of my house.
I don't want anyone to see it and possibly see it, plus with it's flat profile, it will be less likely to get knocked off during a storm or hurricane.
It's not priced too badly, but I need to wait on it for now.
September is not the month to be buying non-necessities for the house, I still have until February 2009, so once the surgery is over and I'm doing well in my recovery, I'll pick one up and do the installation.
I don't want anyone to have to come do it for me, I like doing this kind of stuff myself

So, insomnia again last night, went to "bed" at like 8:30am, woke up at 1:30pm.
Got a phone call from the hospital I'm having surgery at saying I missed an appointment today.
What?!?!
They will be calling me back.

Teens came home from school, brought in 2 packages.
I got another book, it's a duplicate, so I'll probably be giving it away to the first come/first get.
2nd package was from Amazon.
I didn't order anything? *confused*
I open the package, and there's the movie I just posted about on Tuesday that I said I was going to buy myself for Halloween.
Christine had left me a comment with the cryptic, "Oh, and watch your mail.  'nuff said!"
That was just on Wednesday, 1 day ago.
I figured ok, next week, maybe Saturday.
Nope, she ordered it, and I got the movie I absolutely adore today!
Instant cheer up from the pissed off feeling of being told I missed a surgical testing appointment that I didn't even know I had.
I would never just miss an appointment!
I have every single appointment written on the paper calendar, digitally entered on my Google calendar, I wouldn't forget, I wouldn't just not show, this is important stuff!
Is it going to screw up my surgery date?
I only have 1 full week left to get everything done!
OMG! *panic*
How could I miss an appointment I never knew I had?
I've really been so so good about writing them all down, arranging the transportation for each one with my sister doing some and Mindy doing almost all of the others.
I wouldn't forget one!
I checked my paper calendar, I checked my Google calendar, there's nothing written down for today for me to do other than to pay my Verizon DSL bill!
I wish they would call me back quickly, let me know what the hell happened, did someone forget to tell me about this one?
I know I have a lot of different appointments for different things, it's very possible someone just overlooked it, forgot to tell me because they made an honest mistake, because I know what day, what time, and where every single appointment is for everything.
Please don't let this screw up the surgery date, let this be an easy fix.
Please.

If I do get told after surgery that I can't sit on my computer and blog, surf etc, for long periods of time, I know what I'll be doing.
A wonderful book publishing company has been sending me a ton of books that look really good and interesting to read.
I'll be able to lay in bed or on the couch, and read all of them.
They sent, just this week, 7 new books, all of them really do look great.
I know they send them to me to read and review and then post about, and even though I am a very quick reader, there's no way I can read that many books in a week.
It's only Wednesday, and they sent me 7 new books.
The same employee at this publisher is the one who sends them all to me, I told her what genre I prefer to read, but I'll read pretty much anything except for romance novels, I really don't like romance stories at all.
But I love this girl who works there, she's really awesome at her job, outstanding customer service, because when I emailed her the list of authors I like, the genres I prefer, she either made a note or a mental note, because she's been sending all of the types I really like.
So thank you, I will be starting to read them all pretty soon!

Now for the funny story about my black wardrobe I said I would share.
Yesterday evening after dinner, I forgot that I needed to go to Walgreen's to pick up another script that they had to order, but it was ready now, so Sebastian and I headed out to go get it and a few other things I needed to pick up like some more shampoo for the boys, and a couple new box fans because we had two of them burn out in the same week.
So anyway, we stop at the corner store for some drinks to have on our walk because it's incredibly hot out.
The owner Sam is there and he has a few friends of his hanging out behind the counter with him.
As I'm paying for our drinks, one of the guys starts talking to me.
He asks me why I always wear black, do I have any clothes that aren't black, and if I do, how come I never wear them.
He says he's always seeing me walking all over the place several times a week, and was curious.
I tell him it's just the color I prefer, I do own other colored clothing, but I rarely wear them.
I just don't like other colors, call it a phobia or whatever, but don't call me goth or emo, it's just the color I prefer.
Then he asks me if I'm hot all the time because of the black clothes, they attract heat ya know, he says.
I tell him that while it's generally true that black does make most people hotter because black absorbs more light energy than say white, and light energy does equal heat, not all people are effected by that general rule of science.
Before my blood pressure started being so high all of the time, I could sit outside all summer long dressed in a black shirt and not sweat a drop, but now?
Oh man, like right now, I am sitting in my house, the AC is on on 68, I have a fan aimed right at my face, and I'm sitting here in nothing but a t-shirt and light fabric shorts, and sweating to death.
I didn't tell him all of that, but then I did tell him that black isn't even really a color, it's the absence of color.
The guys just looks at me and says what?
"I said, black is not a color, it's the absence of color. Black is the total absence of light, therefore, it is the absence of color. The colors of light are red, green, and blue (known as RGB), black has no light at all, so it is the absence of color.
He sat there totally dumbfounded.
I asked if he has access to the net, he said yes, so I told him to go look it up when he got home, just go to google and type in "black is the absence of color", and he'll be able to read it for himself.
The additive color theory says that when all of the colors of light are added up, the end color is white.
The subtractive color theory says that on a molecular level, when using actual pigments to color a tangible object with, like crayons or paint, when you add all of the colors of light, red, green, and blue, when combined the end color is black.
But in the natural world, black is not a color, and not all people are effected by black attracting light energy, and in some rare cases, some people actually get colder when wearing black because their skin reacts to light energy differently than the majority of people.

Sam the owner starts laughing and says I told you she was too smart for you!
I said we had to get going, things to do, we were walking there and I needed to pick up some things and head back home before it gets dark, the light will be leaving and we'll be left with the absence of it, and I winked at the guy who had asked, and then we left.
As the door was closing, I hear the guy say to Sam, "I think her intelligence just increased her hotness factor by another 50 points. She'll never go out with me man!"

As Sebastian and I are waiting at the corner for the walk light to let us cross, he says to me,
"Guys are always checking you out, they like your hair, your eyes, your pretty face and your butt. But that is the very first time I've ever heard a guy say that they think you're hotter now that they know you're smart.Would you date him?"
I said I don't know, I don't even know him. He might be a really nice guy, but I don't even know his name. He may have seen me walking all over the place, but today is the very first time I've ever seen him, so how would I possibly know if I'd go out with him?

Sebastian thought about this the whole time we crossed the 4 lane road, and when we got to the other side he says, "Well not only does he think you're pretty, but he now finds you even more attractive because you're smart. Most guys don't like super smart girls, so when you find one that does and he wants to date you, you should grab onto him because the chances of finding another guy who likes you for being smart are pretty slim mom. If he does work up the courage to ask you out, you should definitely say yes, plus he seems like a nice guy."

I dropped it right there, I didn't feel like explaining for the millionth time that I'm just not interested in dating anyone.
I like being by myself because the majority of people annoy me.

I haven't had anything to eat since midnight last night, I had to fast for my blood draw at 9:30am, (did I post this already?) and I'm starving!
I ran to the corner store just about 30 minutes ago, grabbed some donuts, (Yum! A chocolate frosted cake donut awaits my return in the fridge) some soda, some other goodies, came back home, and in like 20 minutes, I'll go hop in the shower and get cleaned up for them to suck my blood out.

I could not sleep for anything, and as a matter of fact, the later it got, the more hyped up I got.
So because I couldn't eat, I did other things to pass the time.
I did a lot of net surfing, forum reading and posting, RSS blog reading, and then I got like this wave of enthusiasm to clean my house.
At like 4am.

I did some dishes, I sprinkled the carpet powder down in all the rooms, (I love the smell of it)  I cleaned off the stove top and all of the counters.
I wiped down and cleaned out the toaster, wiped down my crock pot because it sits on the counter and tends to get splashed when I cook sketti sauce in my electric skillet.
I wiped down the entire outside of the microwave, not just the parts you can see, I actually moved it, cleaned under it, behind it, washed the back splash on the whole counter where I prep and cook.
Changed out the like 10 month-old burnt out light bulb on the stove head, put a large bowl of soapy water in the microwave to loosen all the nuked on crud, and I will wipe it all out and clean it really good when I get back, folded the last load of laundry that was in the dryer after I set it on de-wrinkle for 20 minutes.
Changed out the hand towels in the bathroom, turned on the Scrubbing Bubbles automatic shower cleaner after running the shower for steam for 5 minutes, cleaned the toilet bowl and the seat, both upper and under, and the lid, brought back in all of the trash cans after the garbage men came, and made a quick list of things I need at the store later like more spray cleaners, and some floor cleaner which I'm out of.

I have no idea where this burst of energy came from, but I did all of that stuff and am still wired to go.
I'm sure I won't be so hyped up after they take about 8 vials of blood outta me.
I mean, no food since midnight combined with exerting all of that energy, I'll probably come home and pass out for 2-3 hours, and then when I wake up, I will be totally drained and the motivation will be gone.
Dammit.
I was on a serious house cleaning roll man, I haven't wanted to truly deep clean the house in months, I got that burst, and it will literally be sucked out of me by the time I get back.
I want to keep going!
I'm hoping I'll still be good to go, I want to really get down and clean the whole house super de-duper good.

And I've decided what I want for my Christmas, er, Halloween present this year!
I want  The Nightmare Before Christmas (2-Disc Collector's Edition) + Digital Copy
I absolutely love that movie, I have it on VHS, but I want it on DVD, and I want the collector's edition version.
I know every single song by heart, I sing along to it, I love watching it, it's a gorgeous looking movie in all it's dark Halloweenie goodness.
It will be mine, oh yes, it will.

I was asked in an email, if the weight loss product that I'm taking has anything to do with my insomnia, my bad sleeping problems I've experienced over the last few days.
The short answer is no.
The long answer is that I've had sleeping issues most of my adult life now.
It has nothing to do with any foods that I'm eating, or supplements that I may be taking, or drinking a diet soda at 9pm every night, it's just my body doing what it likes to do which is go for a minimum of 3 days without sleeping, to a maximum of 13 days without sleeping more than an hour or two at night, and then when it finally decides it's tired enough, I'll sleep for one night, about 8-10 hours, and be completely back to normal again.

On Wednesday night, I didn't sleep, on Thursday night, I didn't fall asleep until almost 5am Friday morning, and last night, Friday night, I again didn't fall asleep until a little after 5am again.
I woke up this morning around 11am because someone called but I didn't make it to the phone on time before they hung up.
I've just been surfing around the internet most of the day now, reading stuff, catching up on internet news etc.
But now I have a lot of work to do so if I owe you an email or a reply to a comment, it will be coming later on tonight.
I'll probably be able to catch up on everything tonight while we watch the new movies that came in from Netflix.

I am so glad that tonight will be the end of having to watch the Rocky movies.
Rocky Balboa came in today's mail, it's the last one, but Sebastian really wants to see it, and it is the last one, so just a little over an hour, 102 minutes running time, and the Rocky movie watching will be done and over with. *phew*